The Pond and Appendages

Contents The Gallery Topography - exteriors 80's & Onwards Pond Fence

In Autumn 2007 the Health and Safety apparatchiks of the Norfolk County Council decided that the College pond posed such a risk to society that it should be fenced in.  The fact that it had existed for at least 150 years, without any known mishap occurring, seems to have been overlooked in the scramble to head off potential litigation in the event that one of the students should take a tumble into its depths (all of about two feet). 

At least the fence is more than just a few posts and rolls of chicken-wire, but will the same happen to all the Norfolk village ponds?  We Should Be Told!  The local populace (especially a certain Robert Kett) have a history of resistance to 'Enclosure' ....

	Looking south, with Peel Hall to the right.
	Looking north, showing the Memorial Garden on the site of the old Drawing Office (Hospital mortuary).
	Fence detail.  The sign says ' Please keep away from the ducks.  Do not feed them.'
	A new arrival, March 2008 .... but what's it for? "It’s a Nissen Hut Model” "It’s a Learning Curve” "It's a Smoking Shelter” [I wish - Ed.] "It’s a Duck House” "I have to comment on the 'new arrival' at the pond. It is clearly a dual purpose rain shelter, for use by both humans and ducks. The front face is designed for entry by full sized humans in the event of a shower of rain, and faces the areas normally inhabited by humans (i.e. places outside the pond). The rear face is designed for entry by full sized ducks, which are well known for their aversion to getting their heads wet, and faces the area normally inhabited by ducks (i.e. the pond). During a light or medium shower, humans and ducks can enter from their respective entrances and meet in the middle, and enjoy a brief period of congenial social discourse and discussion of important topics such as Eng. Lit. and pond algae, until the shower passes and they can go their respective ways." - David Cook

I note that you have a recent picture of the new 'pond fence' by David Spinks.  Despite only being installed recently a little anecdote already relates to it. To set the scene, the fence is metal with large gaps between the small uprights, gaps between panels, even gaps underneath in places. Also, as many may have noticed, ducks have feathery appendages which they are able to use in a flappy, birdy-type way. Thus the following conversation between two working colleagues is all the more amusing. To spare blushes it's obviously paraphrased, anonymous and probably inaccurate after 38 renditions but ....

"What are they doing?"
"Putting a fence around the pond."
"Why?"
"For safety."
"What about the ducks?"
"What about the ducks ... ?"
"How are they going to get in and out?"
 ... pause of but a split second before the answer ...
"It's ok, they're installing a duck flap."
"That's ok then ..."

Work then carried on as normal, not a flicker of realisation until everyone else collapsed with laughter ... :-)

Andy Gardiner
Lit me tell yew tha' orl vews, ign'rent o' th' fax an' tu'al lud a' squit tha' thay moit be, are me own unless oi sed atherwoise